Prank Call
by AmbiKitty
Summary: One shot. Read to find out what Laguna and Kiros do one rainy day. Please R&R.


Okay, I'm not quite sure where I came up with this one; I just thought a prank call would be funny to base a fanfic around. That and I just wanted to post another fanfic.

This is rated M for a reason, so if you're easily offended, please stop reading now.

Disclaimer: I do not own Laguna, Kiros, Raine, Blockbuster, or Hooters...not that I would ever want to.

No flaming, please.

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-Prank Call-

One rainy, Sunday afternoon, we find Laguna and Kiros in Laguna's room in Winhill. Both bored to death.

Laguna looked over at his friend. "So, what do you want to do?"

Kiros shook his head. "I'm the guest, you come up with something."

"Damn… Okay." Laguna said. A few minutes of thinking pass before Laguna's eyes light up with an idea. "I know what we can do!" He exclaimed, as he quickly reached for the phone and began dialing.

"What?" Kiros asked.

"Shh! Quiet!"

The phone could be heard ringing. Soon, a woman's voice came on the line.

"Winhill Tavern." It was Raine's voice.

Laguna changed his voice a bit, so that Raine would hopefully not be able to recognize who he was. "Yes, hello. Do you serve chicken?"

Kiros' raised an eyebrow, unsure of what his friend intended to do.

"Yes, we do." She said.

"So, how big are they? Your breasts, I mean." Laguna was trying not to laugh.

Raine gasped. "YOU PERVERT!" she yelled and hung up the phone.

Laguna slowly hung up the phone, and then he silently stared at it for a moment. "Well, that didn't go very well..." Laguna hung his head. "Okay, this time, it'll be different!" He picked up the receiver again and pushed the button for Raine's number.

Kiros groaned and shook his head. He was beginning to regret letting Laguna come up with something for them to do.

"Winhill Tavern." Raine's voice came, for the second time.

Laguna changed his voice again; different from how he had done before. "Yes, this is Blockbuster. I'm looking for a Ms. Raine, of Winhill."

"Speaking."

"I believe you are renting a movie from us and our computers say that it was due back yesterday at noon."

"That's strange, I don't remember renting anything from Blockbuster recently. What movie is it?" There was a long silence.

"Uh...I'm gonna, have to call you back." He hung up the phone.

"You're terrible at prank calls." Kiros put in.

"What? You think you can do better?"

Kiros was silent for a moment. "…Maybe."

Laguna held the phone out to Kiros. "Prove it."

Kiros looked at Laguna for a moment then to the phone. He reluctantly took it.

"Well…?" Laguna coaxed.

"I'm thinking."

"Her number's on speed dial. Under one."

A few minutes passes, before Kiros finally picked up the receiver and pushed the button for Raine's number. After three rings, the phone picked up and Raine came on the phone again.

"Winhill Tavern…" she sounded annoyed. Probably from Laguna's two prank calls.

Kiros changed his voice, similarly to how Laguna had done. "Yes, Hello. I need to speak to a woman named Raine, please."

"This is her…" undoubtedly, she had a feeling that this was another prank call.

"Wonderful. Ms. Raine, it is Ms, isn't it?"

"Yes…" She sounded annoyed.

"Well, Ms. Raine, we received your application and we would like to hire you. I've called you, to find out your measurements."

Laguna turned red, with trying not to laugh. He fell with a crash, when Kiros pushed him off the bed.

"What was that?" she asked.

"Oh, nothing. It was just an idiot, who just fell on the floor," he glanced over to Laguna, who was now glaring up at him, "Now, about those measurements…"

"U-um-uh, w-what do you need those for, e-exactly?"

"Oh, it's for your uniform."

"Oh, uh, actually, I'd prefer that I buy my own uniform, if that's alright."

"That's alright, Ms. Raine, we here at Hooters respect-"

"WHAT?!" Raine yelled.

Laguna is breathing into a paper bag, as he was having a hard time breathing.

"-Our employees right-"

"WAIT A MINUTE!!"

"-To purchase-"

"I NEVER APPLIED TO HOOTERS!!"

"-Their own clothing."

Laguna ran out of the room, unable to contain his laughter anymore.

"I'M HANGING UP!!"

"Now, let's start with your bra size."

Raine hung up the phone. Kiros looked at the receiver for a moment, then he too, hung up the phone.

Kiros smiled to himself, as Laguna came back up the stairs and leaned on the doorframe, his face red.

"Y-you-" Laguna started, trying to catch his breath.

"Yes?" Kiros asked, still smiling.

"You-" he inhaled deeply, "-are a genius…"

"Why thank you."

"Hey. Look what I found." Laguna held up a world phonebook.

That wiped the smile right off Kiros face. "Please, don't…"

Laguna sat down on the bed and went through the phonebook. After a little page flipping, he picked up the receiver and dialed. "Yeah, hi. I'm looking for-"

Kiros hung his head in shame. "What have I done…?"

"Good morning. We received you application and would-"

Kiros got up and walked down stairs and headed for next door. "Maybe Raine'll give me a free drink if I tell her it was Laguna that prank called her…"

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Thank you for reading. Hope you enjoyed this one. I had a bit more fun writing this, than I did writing my last fanfic. Please remember to review.


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